3-5-03 There are so many things that I want to do with my site, but I just can't seem to find the time to do it. I really want to redesign my index page, and there are a whole bunch of things that I want to add, but most of it is on my laptop at home and I don't get very much time to work on it there. (I'm typing this at work right now ^_^)

I guess I'll just need to work on it a little bit at a time.

I have been working on my story with Dawn a lot recently. We've been working on the characters and history of the story. We only have a little over a page right now of actual story, but we have pages and pages of research. I'm having fun doing that, but I really need to work on my story with Jennifer and tie two or three scenes together. Erg. I just haven't gotten a chance to sit down and figure out how to string the scenes together.

3-6-03 I have figured out one of the many ways to tell if someone has Lord of the Rings on their brain. Instead of typing a website address or e-mail address as .net you write .ent . But I don't really have ents on the brain. Luckily.

I'm starting to get worried about my trip to Korea, apparently nobody recommends being an English teacher there, but I don't know of any other job I could get in Korea. I don't speak Korean, so I don't know what to do. I was hoping to get a job that I liked so I could stay at least two years.

All I know is that I need to get out of here and to start earning more money, or live some place cheaper, where I can save more money. The problem is I have a B.S. in Journalism, with an emphasis on print media, and I hate working for a newspaper. I can't work part-time forever, I'm not able to pay off enough of my bills that away, even though I do like where I'm working. Money is my main factor right now, sadly.

I think that its driving me crazy. If anyone reading this is planning to go to college I suggest that you DO NOT get student loans or credit cards. Instead apply for a pell grant, work study, other grants, fellowships and any other inane scholarships that you can get your hands on. I don't think anything is worse than going into debt to pay a debt. And that's sort of what I'm doing now.

I pay about $600 a semester to take 6 credit hours, so I am enrolled half-time. This delays my student loans, so I don't have to pay them off immediately. And I have to do this, or pay back my student loans, and that would cost more than paying $600 dollars every five months. But then I don't really get any where, I can pay some money on my student loans and what I pay will be interest free, but with all my other bills I don't have the money to pay them. So I'm stuck in a vicious cycle until I can begin earning more money. Which means finding a different job. Only right now its almost impossible to find a job here that isn't fast food, and even those are scarce.

3-10-03 Oh my goodness! A few days ago I was talking to my friend, Dawn, about a road trip that we may plan in the future. And I was telling her if we go to California we should stop by L.A. some day and try doing some auditions. In trying to convince her to do this, because she thought that she would be too nervous to, I said that we would only audition for Orland Bloom or Viggo Mortensen. And then a few days ago I found a link to a website that is auditioning for extras in a movie that Orlando is going to be in. Is it a coincidence? I think not!

3-11-03 I've lost about five pounds since January, I only have 15 more pounds to go to my goal. But then I went and had a big lunch. Which is probably why I've been losing weight so slowly. Oh well.

I've been working on a new page for my website. You can see it here. Of course its not finished yet.

I've also begun redesigning my main page, I know how I was it to look, there is just a bunch of HTML to figure out.

3-12-03 I've added more pictures to my space page.

I got to talk to my friend John, or one of my best friend's ex-boyfriends who is now my friend (did I confuse you? ^_^) He leaves the 18th to go to Washington, and from there he goes to the Middle East.

Nothings happening at work, there's no one here, they're all at a livestock show.

3-14-03 I walked to work yesturday, it took me 40 minutes. My butt aches today. Too much walking.

Things are a little crazy today. We're having the Spring Livestock Bonus Sale today and I'm trying to fax the catalogues out, its slow going, but more people are asking us to fax every few minutes, so I'm very behind. It can't be helped though since our fax machine is old.

3-18-03 I began the update on my index page and a few other pages.

3-20-03 So we're going to war. By we I mean the British and Americans, because apparently nobody else in the world feels threatened. Maybe because they're stupid. I haven't figured that part out yet.

I have to admit I am divided on the war. On one hand I don't want people hurt, but on the other hand I also don't think the situation in the Middle East can continue. The countries over there seem to act like the are the only countries and the rest of the world be damned.

I don't know I think just the whole thing upsets me. I have a friend floating some where in the Middle East and my father has the possibility of being recalled to the Air Force, and a bunch of the people in my office have husbands or other relatives being shipped out to the Middle East, so it's not a fun day here.

Jim C. Hine's writing journal today had a link to Raed's blog, but I believe the main writer is Salam.

I am so tired, I walked to work today, 40 minutes. Work is just too long and boring to concentrate on today.

La-la-la-la. There's a war going on in the Middle East and nothing, absolutely nothing is going on here.

The books that I ordered yesterday on amazon.com are floating around some where in the city today, that was really fast considering they said it would take five or nine days. I ordered two Korean books. I have to begin learning Korean faster.

3-21-03 Happy Spring! Spring is here! Yay!

I think I have figured out what I find wrong with this war. The people here are indifferent to it. They don't care one way or the other about the politics. Of course Lawton is right next to Fort Sill, so what most people do care about is if/when their relatives, friends, etc. are going to come home, safe. They don't care about the whys of the war.

I find this odd and very disturbing. The last time American troops went to the Middle East I was still in high school and I remember everyone tying yellow ribbons on anything that would stand still and lots of flags. But I guess for this war everyone is divided by politics that no one is supporting the troops that have to leave.

Is that weird to anyone else? Or is it just me?

I think the war is on everyone's mind, but it hasn't effected their life beyond being an inconvience. I think the people here are more worried about gas prices.

I don't know I guess I expect more support for the countries administration when they finally decided to do something, even if the rest of the world doesn't agree with it. Maybe I'm expecting too much, they are human after all.

I have been asked if this effects my plans to go to Korea, but it doesn't. Because I know that if I don't go during this time in my life I'll probably never go. Or if I did go it would be as a tourist and nothing more.

I have decided that I am either deeply disturbed or completely irrational. I haven't figured out which one is better.

Am very frivolus, I've been looking at other blogs today and everyone else seems to have important opinons about the war. My only opinon is that nobody around here really seems to care. They act like its happening on another planet. Sort of "oooh look at the pretty pictures," type of the thing. Maybe I'm being hard on them all and they are all occupied with very serious thoughts that they don't want to share. Either that or they are all the pathetic sheep that I think they are.

I am in such a grouchy mood it seems. I don't feel grouchy, but everything I'm writing is so mean, even to myself.

3-24-03 My dad must just love annoying me. He just keeps pissing me off. Anyways I only have five more months here. And I will leave at the end of August, even if I have to take the crappiest job in Seoul to get out of here.

I'm starting to prepare for my leaving. I'm selling books that I don't want right now on E-bay, and I'll begin selling other things too soon. I have to admit that I have collected a lot of junk. Stuff that I don't need, will never read or use, and that is just taking up space. So I'm going to try and sell it all on E-bay. The problem that makes it take so long to get things listed on E-bay is that I don't have a digital camera right now, so I have to take everything to work and take a picture of it there. I'm going to see if I can barrow the camera and take it home, then I'll be able to take a bunch of pictures and list more things right away. Incase your interested in any of my items they are listed under LadyMystra.

Erg. (that's the sound I make when I'm annoyed.) I am so crabby.

3-25-03 Busy, busy, busy at work for me today. I have to put out 700 newsletters today! And of course I was left all alone to do this. So I don't know if I'll make it, but I'm going to try.

Plus I have a critique to write for Critters. I had started with that group once before, but I had to quit. And I'm now back again.

3-28-03 I am so glad that it is Friday. It just feels like every day is the same now, and that the weekends aren't long enough to accomplish anything.

I found a really great website a few days ago. Actually I had seen the website before, but this time I actually stopped to look at it. An American Teaching English in South Korea. It is one of the few journals that I have read that isn't full of horror stories about teaching in Korea. It makes me really hopeful that I will like my own experience in Korea. I really want to be able to enjoy my experience and not be all crabby and a grouch.

I hope that I'm not expecting too much out of my journey. I know if I expect too much that I'll be disappointed, disillusioned, and that may color my experience, but its so hard not to have some expectations. Plus since I'm planning to get a job in Seoul I know that city will be larger than any I've lived in before, including Las Vegas.

Plus I have been told that I might have trouble being hired because I look Korean, even though I don't think I look Korean, basiclly I don't have blonde hair, blue eyes and white skin. So I am a bit worried that the only schools that would hire me are the bad ones. I think it will all turn out alright if I keep a positive attitude.

3-31-03 It's freezing in the office today. I walked to work, so I didn't notice at first, but after sitting down for a few minutes I looked at the temperature in the room and noticed that it was 66 degrees. CNN says it's 46 degrees F and the Weather Channel says its 55. I have no idea, but to me for spring time it sure is cold.

I think either Thursday or Friday I sent Dawn what I had written on our story. I guess she got it over the weekend and said that she really loved it. Of course it was only 4 or 5 pages. She is going to write the next part. ^_^

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